WEBVTT 00:00:00.320 --> 00:00:01.500 So I've got a question. 00:00:01.720 --> 00:00:06.800 Are we ready to admit yet that the manosphere exists for a reason? 00:00:06.801 --> 00:00:08.520 This isn't a defense of it. 00:00:08.521 --> 00:00:10.120 I don't think it should. And in fact, 00:00:10.121 --> 00:00:13.240 the main reason I started this account was to fight back against it. 00:00:13.241 --> 00:00:14.120 But, like, 00:00:14.121 --> 00:00:18.660 can we collectively admit that something this ugly with this much staying power 00:00:19.000 --> 00:00:21.960 does serve a purpose? Because 00:00:21.961 --> 00:00:28.160 anytime I see a video where somebody inches towards a modicum of understanding 00:00:28.161 --> 00:00:30.540 as to why something like this might exist, 00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:34.320 they just thoughtlessly write it off as standard 00:00:34.321 --> 00:00:37.880 garden variety misogyny and move on with their day, 00:00:37.881 --> 00:00:40.840 having unveiled no real information 00:00:40.841 --> 00:00:42.800 and conferring no real value to the rest of us 00:00:42.801 --> 00:00:45.600 to understanding why we've gotten here. 00:00:45.601 --> 00:00:47.760 So let's start with that, because I think the most common 00:00:47.761 --> 00:00:51.040 and most harmful misunderstanding about the manosphere 00:00:51.041 --> 00:00:57.120 is that it exists to amplify a pre existing hatred of women 00:00:57.121 --> 00:00:59.020 in the men who get sucked into it. 00:00:59.040 --> 00:01:01.960 And as a man who did get sucked into it 15 years ago, 00:01:01.961 --> 00:01:03.640 nothing could be further from the truth. 00:01:03.641 --> 00:01:05.560 I have, since I was a child, 00:01:05.561 --> 00:01:08.320 firmly believed that men and women were equal, 00:01:08.321 --> 00:01:12.080 and I have primarily been friends with and gotten along with 00:01:12.081 --> 00:01:15.520 and been close to women. The one thing people do seem to get right is 00:01:15.521 --> 00:01:18.280 I was be pretty unsuccessful romantically, 00:01:18.281 --> 00:01:20.200 and I was very frustrated about that. 00:01:20.201 --> 00:01:22.800 So the first thing that I did is talk to the women I knew. 00:01:22.801 --> 00:01:27.240 And even look online for advice from women in what I might be getting wrong. 00:01:27.241 --> 00:01:29.440 And this is not something that's unique to me. 00:01:29.441 --> 00:01:31.480 Nearly every man that I have talked to 00:01:31.481 --> 00:01:35.820 or seen talk about their entry into the manosphere or the red pill 00:01:36.160 --> 00:01:38.080 has had the same first step, 00:01:38.081 --> 00:01:39.320 that they have either talked to 00:01:39.321 --> 00:01:43.080 or looked to two women online for advice on what they should do. 00:01:43.081 --> 00:01:45.820 And all of us got the same answers back. 00:01:46.120 --> 00:01:48.540 Just be yourself or just be nice. 00:01:48.680 --> 00:01:51.800 Which, in case you're wondering why we have this scourge of nice guys 00:01:51.801 --> 00:01:54.200 who believe that is enough for them to be attractive to somebody, 00:01:54.201 --> 00:01:58.480 it is because that is what they were told was the only thing they needed to do. 00:01:58.481 --> 00:02:00.280 Now, before anyone gets upset about what I've just said, 00:02:00.281 --> 00:02:03.340 I need you to understand that I don't care. 00:02:03.360 --> 00:02:04.760 This is an informative video, 00:02:04.761 --> 00:02:07.300 not a criticism nor defense of anything. 00:02:07.320 --> 00:02:08.420 Let's stay on topic. 00:02:08.440 --> 00:02:11.920 Having failed to glean any useful advice from the women I talk to on this topic, 00:02:11.921 --> 00:02:16.540 I decided the next best place to look would be men who seem to be successful. 00:02:16.640 --> 00:02:18.840 This is where a lot of people like to hack together an analogy 00:02:18.841 --> 00:02:20.000 about fish and fishermen. But 00:02:20.001 --> 00:02:22.500 I think the reality is that we just think a lot less 00:02:22.560 --> 00:02:24.920 about what attracts us to other people 00:02:24.921 --> 00:02:27.340 than what attracts other people to us. 00:02:27.600 --> 00:02:30.320 But this right here is the Trojan horse. 00:02:30.321 --> 00:02:32.880 Because for most Men again, 00:02:32.881 --> 00:02:34.280 at least the ones who get sucked into this, 00:02:34.281 --> 00:02:36.940 this is the first time in their life that they have gotten good, 00:02:37.080 --> 00:02:41.580 useful advice on how to be more compelling and attractive to women. 00:02:41.600 --> 00:02:45.160 Because it's not just be yourself or be more confident or go to the gym. 00:02:45.161 --> 00:02:45.720 It is. 00:02:45.721 --> 00:02:50.740 Here is a step by step guide on what could make you more socially compelling. 00:02:50.760 --> 00:02:51.840 You need to go to the gym. 00:02:51.841 --> 00:02:53.480 Here is a good starter program. 00:02:53.481 --> 00:02:54.760 Here is what you're looking for. 00:02:54.761 --> 00:02:56.080 You need better style. Great. 00:02:56.081 --> 00:02:57.720 Here are some examples of what look better. 00:02:57.721 --> 00:03:01.520 This is a thoroughly fleshed out guide 00:03:01.521 --> 00:03:04.280 on how to be more attractive and compelling as a man. 00:03:04.281 --> 00:03:05.720 And not all of the advice is good, 00:03:05.721 --> 00:03:06.480 and often times 00:03:06.481 --> 00:03:09.780 they will give the wrong reason for why the good advice does work. 00:03:10.200 --> 00:03:11.560 But this is the first time in my life 00:03:11.561 --> 00:03:14.560 that I got advice on the subject that actually worked. 00:03:14.561 --> 00:03:17.160 And from there, it's a steady stream of indoctrination 00:03:17.161 --> 00:03:20.860 where they use their position as the first person to give you good advice 00:03:20.880 --> 00:03:23.040 to convince you that everyone else gave you bad advice 00:03:23.041 --> 00:03:25.560 because they don't care, because they don't want you to succeed, 00:03:25.561 --> 00:03:28.080 because you're just not good enough in their eyes. 00:03:28.081 --> 00:03:31.520 And therefore, this community is all you have. 00:03:31.521 --> 00:03:34.080 They use the fact that the advice women gave you didn't work 00:03:34.081 --> 00:03:36.180 when the formulas that they gave you did 00:03:36.360 --> 00:03:39.720 as evidence that women supposedly lack agency 00:03:39.721 --> 00:03:43.240 and They use the existence of this broadly anti man content, which, 00:03:43.241 --> 00:03:45.140 don't kid yourself, is out there, 00:03:45.240 --> 00:03:47.940 as evidence that women hate you. 00:03:48.080 --> 00:03:50.120 So all you're doing is protecting yourself. 00:03:50.121 --> 00:03:52.240 I spent a good amount of time learning about these tactics 00:03:52.241 --> 00:03:56.160 over the last 10 years. And this is not unique to the manosphere. 00:03:56.161 --> 00:04:00.180 This is the basic playbook of indoctrination. 00:04:00.200 --> 00:04:03.480 But as long as we pretend that male loneliness is something that they deserve, 00:04:03.481 --> 00:04:05.920 that the only men who aren't successful in their dating lives 00:04:05.921 --> 00:04:08.640 are men who hate women or are seeking to use them, 00:04:08.641 --> 00:04:11.540 then we guarantee that they have nowhere to go 00:04:11.760 --> 00:04:14.960 except for the people who will teach them to do just that. 00:04:14.961 --> 00:04:17.320 And if you tell yourself that this only works on weak people 00:04:17.321 --> 00:04:18.860 and it could never happen to you, 00:04:19.080 --> 00:04:23.388 then all you're doing is making sure that you are the perfect target.