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hi guys welcome or welcome back I'm Anna hi guys welcome or welcome back I'm Anna hi guys welcome or welcome back I'm Anna Udin I'm a doctor of Clinical Psychology Udin I'm a doctor of Clinical Psychology Udin I'm a doctor of Clinical Psychology and an author and today I have kind of a and an author and today I have kind of a and an author and today I have kind of a strange topic for the occasion of strange topic for the occasion of strange topic for the occasion of Valentine's Day I thought I would talk a Valentine's Day I thought I would talk a Valentine's Day I thought I would talk a little bit about dating apps so I have little bit about dating apps so I have little bit about dating apps so I have made a video on dating apps in the past made a video on dating apps in the past made a video on dating apps in the past I probably unlisted it since I get I probably unlisted it since I get I probably unlisted it since I get self-conscious about videos that are a self-conscious about videos that are a self-conscious about videos that are a couple years back but I was thinking I couple years back but I was thinking I couple years back but I was thinking I should do a revamp of the research on should do a revamp of the research on should do a revamp of the research on dating apps and I was looking through a dating apps and I was looking through a dating apps and I was looking through a critical analysis of all the research critical analysis of all the research critical analysis of all the research which if you don't know those typically which if you don't know those typically which if you don't know those typically summarize and assess dozens of different summarize and assess dozens of different summarize and assess dozens of different research articles on a specific topic 
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research articles on a specific topic research articles on a specific topic and I was jotting down my notes I was and I was jotting down my notes I was and I was jotting down my notes I was thinking okay how can I talk about this thinking okay how can I talk about this thinking okay how can I talk about this on YouTube and then it occurred to me on YouTube and then it occurred to me on YouTube and then it occurred to me this critical analysis would actually be this critical analysis would actually be this critical analysis would actually be really helpful specifically to get really helpful specifically to get really helpful specifically to get people to understand how they can use people to understand how they can use people to understand how they can use dating apps in a way that maximizes dating apps in a way that maximizes dating apps in a way that maximizes their chances of finding love so it's their chances of finding love so it's their chances of finding love so it's today I'm going to be telling you how I today I'm going to be telling you how I today I'm going to be telling you how I would use dating apps in the year 2024 would use dating apps in the year 2024 would use dating apps in the year 2024 if I were looking for love on dating if I were looking for love on dating if I were looking for love on dating apps and if you know me you know I am apps and if you know me you know I am apps and if you know me you know I am very very happily married so that is not very very happily married so that is not very very happily married so that is not the case but I thought if this is the case but I thought if this is the case but I thought if this is helpful for any of you before we get helpful for any of you before we get helpful for any of you before we get into that I just just want to tell you I into that I just just want to tell you I into that I just just want to tell you I have a big Valentine's Day sale on all 
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have a big Valentine's Day sale on all have a big Valentine's Day sale on all of my products so you can get the paper of my products so you can get the paper of my products so you can get the paper packs of my journaling workbooks for 40% packs of my journaling workbooks for 40% packs of my journaling workbooks for 40% off is previously $4.99 now it's $8.99 off is previously $4.99 now it's $8.99 off is previously $4.99 now it's $8.99 as for my novel the lowest that Amazon as for my novel the lowest that Amazon as for my novel the lowest that Amazon will let me price it is $1.59 so that is will let me price it is $1.59 so that is will let me price it is $1.59 so that is definitely the lowest that it is ever definitely the lowest that it is ever definitely the lowest that it is ever going to be I also have a promo code for going to be I also have a promo code for going to be I also have a promo code for my course where you can find four plus my course where you can find four plus my course where you can find four plus hours lessons exercises journaling hours lessons exercises journaling hours lessons exercises journaling prompts and so forth on how to improve prompts and so forth on how to improve prompts and so forth on how to improve your relational life so the code for your relational life so the code for your relational life so the code for that is vday sale all of these links that is vday sale all of these links that is vday sale all of these links will be in the description all right so will be in the description all right so will be in the description all right so the structure of this video is going to the structure of this video is going to the structure of this video is going to be as follows first I'm going to talk a 
[1:33]
be as follows first I'm going to talk a be as follows first I'm going to talk a little bit about understanding people's little bit about understanding people's little bit about understanding people's motives on dating apps and how to use motives on dating apps and how to use motives on dating apps and how to use that to figure out who has the same that to figure out who has the same that to figure out who has the same motive as you of basically finding love motive as you of basically finding love motive as you of basically finding love finding a relationship then I'm going to finding a relationship then I'm going to finding a relationship then I'm going to talk about how I would try to put my talk about how I would try to put my talk about how I would try to put my best foot forward in terms of concrete best foot forward in terms of concrete best foot forward in terms of concrete things I would include on the dating app things I would include on the dating app things I would include on the dating app like photos and bio and things of that like photos and bio and things of that like photos and bio and things of that sort and then I would talk about how I sort and then I would talk about how I sort and then I would talk about how I would try to turn a match into our would try to turn a match into our would try to turn a match into our relationship so let's get into it it it [Music] 
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so motives you have to first and so motives you have to first and so motives you have to first and foremost understand people's motives on foremost understand people's motives on foremost understand people's motives on dating apps the research has shown that dating apps the research has shown that dating apps the research has shown that there are a few different types of there are a few different types of there are a few different types of motives that people have on dating apps motives that people have on dating apps motives that people have on dating apps it actually isn't that everyone wants it actually isn't that everyone wants it actually isn't that everyone wants something casual like we tend to assume something casual like we tend to assume something casual like we tend to assume about dating apps some of course do want about dating apps some of course do want about dating apps some of course do want casual relationships some do also want casual relationships some do also want casual relationships some do also want love many just want a little excitement love many just want a little excitement love many just want a little excitement and someone to communicate easily with and someone to communicate easily with and someone to communicate easily with in their day-to-day life the sort of in their day-to-day life the sort of in their day-to-day life the sort of offset feelings of boredom and offset feelings of boredom and offset feelings of boredom and loneliness I think we are all noticing 
[2:44]
loneliness I think we are all noticing loneliness I think we are all noticing that we live in a very lonely Society that we live in a very lonely Society that we live in a very lonely Society where it's very difficult to feel where it's very difficult to feel where it's very difficult to feel connected with other people and dating connected with other people and dating connected with other people and dating apps are a really simple way to get some apps are a really simple way to get some apps are a really simple way to get some of that connection kick you know it's so of that connection kick you know it's so of that connection kick you know it's so simple you just download an app put some simple you just download an app put some simple you just download an app put some photos on there and then you are in photos on there and then you are in photos on there and then you are in contact with dozens and dozens of people contact with dozens and dozens of people contact with dozens and dozens of people some people also want self- validation some people also want self- validation some people also want self- validation so there are some people who go on these so there are some people who go on these so there are some people who go on these apps just to get a bunch of matches and apps just to get a bunch of matches and apps just to get a bunch of matches and a bunch of responses maybe even to chat a bunch of responses maybe even to chat a bunch of responses maybe even to chat with people in a way that validates with people in a way that validates with people in a way that validates their self-esteem they're not 
[3:14]
their self-esteem they're not their self-esteem they're not necessarily looking for connection necessarily looking for connection necessarily looking for connection they're not looking for something they're not looking for something they're not looking for something serious they're not looking for serious they're not looking for serious they're not looking for something casual they just want a little something casual they just want a little something casual they just want a little kick of their ego so this article that I kick of their ego so this article that I kick of their ego so this article that I talked about this critical analysis said talked about this critical analysis said talked about this critical analysis said that up to 70% say they are not on these that up to 70% say they are not on these that up to 70% say they are not on these dating apps just for sex women tend to dating apps just for sex women tend to dating apps just for sex women tend to use dating apps more for friendship and use dating apps more for friendship and use dating apps more for friendship and for self- validation while men tend to for self- validation while men tend to for self- validation while men tend to use it more for sex and relationships use it more for sex and relationships use it more for sex and relationships men also tend to use them more for men also tend to use them more for men also tend to use them more for casual relationships sexual minorities casual relationships sexual minorities casual relationships sexual minorities also tend to be more in search for also tend to be more in search for also tend to be more in search for something casual people who have dark 
[3:45]
something casual people who have dark something casual people who have dark Triad personalities melanism psychopathy Triad personalities melanism psychopathy Triad personalities melanism psychopathy narcissism particularly the first two narcissism particularly the first two narcissism particularly the first two studies show that they use these apps studies show that they use these apps studies show that they use these apps more for something casual and to acquire more for something casual and to acquire more for something casual and to acquire social or flirting skills so given these social or flirting skills so given these social or flirting skills so given these different motivations on dating apps How different motivations on dating apps How different motivations on dating apps How would would I know if somebody is likely would would I know if somebody is likely would would I know if somebody is likely looking for love versus any of the other looking for love versus any of the other looking for love versus any of the other things that I mentioned the first thing things that I mentioned the first thing things that I mentioned the first thing is that I would pay attention to how is that I would pay attention to how is that I would pay attention to how responsive they are if somebody is not responsive they are if somebody is not responsive they are if somebody is not responsive at all or doesn't really seem responsive at all or doesn't really seem responsive at all or doesn't really seem to be putting much effort into the to be putting much effort into the to be putting much effort into the communication then they're probably 
[4:15]
communication then they're probably communication then they're probably there for validation right they swiped there for validation right they swiped there for validation right they swiped on you they clearly thought you're on you they clearly thought you're on you they clearly thought you're attractive they're on a dating app but attractive they're on a dating app but attractive they're on a dating app but they're not pursuing it further there's they're not pursuing it further there's they're not pursuing it further there's a good chance that they just want that a good chance that they just want that a good chance that they just want that kick of ooh I'm wanted somebody who's kick of ooh I'm wanted somebody who's kick of ooh I'm wanted somebody who's interested in a relationship is also interested in a relationship is also interested in a relationship is also probably going to ask you about yourself probably going to ask you about yourself probably going to ask you about yourself about your history about your current about your history about your current about your history about your current life because they are trying to build an life because they are trying to build an life because they are trying to build an intimate connection with someone they intimate connection with someone they intimate connection with someone they might want to increase intimacy by might want to increase intimacy by might want to increase intimacy by taking things off the app and texting on taking things off the app and texting on taking things off the app and texting on the phone calling on the phone the phone calling on the phone the phone calling on the phone FaceTiming going on a date you know FaceTiming going on a date you know FaceTiming going on a date you know they're not going to just stay on the 
[4:45]
they're not going to just stay on the they're not going to just stay on the app forever and just keep it that way app forever and just keep it that way app forever and just keep it that way they're going to want to actually see they're going to want to actually see they're going to want to actually see you in person I would also pay attention you in person I would also pay attention you in person I would also pay attention to what they have on their profile to what they have on their profile to what they have on their profile things that indicate a person might not things that indicate a person might not things that indicate a person might not be looking for love is if their profile be looking for love is if their profile be looking for love is if their profile is all very appearance related very is all very appearance related very is all very appearance related very sexual where it's clear that they're sexual where it's clear that they're sexual where it's clear that they're flaunting their body or they're not flaunting their body or they're not flaunting their body or they're not really showing much of their personality really showing much of their personality really showing much of their personality there's a good chance they're not there there's a good chance they're not there there's a good chance they're not there for love they might be there for for love they might be there for for love they might be there for something more casual or again for just something more casual or again for just something more casual or again for just that excitement and validation similarly that excitement and validation similarly that excitement and validation similarly if they don't have a lot of personalized if they don't have a lot of personalized if they don't have a lot of personalized information in their bio it might show 
[5:17]
information in their bio it might show information in their bio it might show like Oh I thought that my photos could like Oh I thought that my photos could like Oh I thought that my photos could just speak for themselves I'm just just speak for themselves I'm just just speak for themselves I'm just looking for something physical I'm not looking for something physical I'm not looking for something physical I'm not actually on here trying to get to know actually on here trying to get to know actually on here trying to get to know other people and trying to have other other people and trying to have other other people and trying to have other people get to know me sometimes people people get to know me sometimes people people get to know me sometimes people will also flat out say in their bio not will also flat out say in their bio not will also flat out say in their bio not looking for anything serious or uh in a looking for anything serious or uh in a looking for anything serious or uh in a relationship or things like that so relationship or things like that so relationship or things like that so obviously that is a big giveaway that uh obviously that is a big giveaway that uh obviously that is a big giveaway that uh this person is probably not here for this person is probably not here for this person is probably not here for love you know I often talk about how love you know I often talk about how love you know I often talk about how everything that we do on social media is everything that we do on social media is everything that we do on social media is a mirror for what we do in real life in a mirror for what we do in real life in a mirror for what we do in real life in real life if someone were ignoring you 
[5:48]
real life if someone were ignoring you real life if someone were ignoring you when you talk to them were completely when you talk to them were completely when you talk to them were completely just focused on their looks and weren't just focused on their looks and weren't just focused on their looks and weren't telling you about who they are as a telling you about who they are as a telling you about who they are as a person asking you about you as a person person asking you about you as a person person asking you about you as a person if they weren't actually trying to if they weren't actually trying to if they weren't actually trying to arrange a date then you would probably arrange a date then you would probably arrange a date then you would probably get the message very quickly that okay get the message very quickly that okay get the message very quickly that okay this person is not genuinely interested this person is not genuinely interested this person is not genuinely interested in dating me it's the same on social in dating me it's the same on social in dating me it's the same on social media it's the same on dating apps if media it's the same on dating apps if media it's the same on dating apps if you're ever struggling to make sense of you're ever struggling to make sense of you're ever struggling to make sense of signs technologically like you're kind signs technologically like you're kind signs technologically like you're kind of struggling to understand what someone of struggling to understand what someone of struggling to understand what someone means on social media just ask yourself means on social media just ask yourself means on social media just ask yourself what would be the equivalent of this in what would be the equivalent of this in what would be the equivalent of this in real life and if it were in real life 
[6:19]
real life and if it were in real life real life and if it were in real life what would I do would I continue to what would I do would I continue to what would I do would I continue to engage with this person or would I say engage with this person or would I say engage with this person or would I say huh this person doesn't seem to be into huh this person doesn't seem to be into huh this person doesn't seem to be into me now how I would put my best foot me now how I would put my best foot me now how I would put my best foot forward to maximize my chances of Love forward to maximize my chances of Love forward to maximize my chances of Love on these apps well it's been a long time on these apps well it's been a long time on these apps well it's been a long time since I've ever been on dating apps but since I've ever been on dating apps but since I've ever been on dating apps but last time I checked there was like an last time I checked there was like an last time I checked there was like an age range and a geographical range so age range and a geographical range so age range and a geographical range so something that I would definitely not do something that I would definitely not do something that I would definitely not do is stretch that out too far to the point is stretch that out too far to the point is stretch that out too far to the point where I wouldn't actually date the where I wouldn't actually date the where I wouldn't actually date the people in those ranges you know if people in those ranges you know if people in those ranges you know if you're 23 for instance and you put your you're 23 for instance and you put your you're 23 for instance and you put your age range to be you know 18 to 40 if you 
[6:51]
age range to be you know 18 to 40 if you age range to be you know 18 to 40 if you wouldn't actually date an 18-year-old or wouldn't actually date an 18-year-old or wouldn't actually date an 18-year-old or a 40-year-old and don't make that your a 40-year-old and don't make that your a 40-year-old and don't make that your age range don't come at it from a place age range don't come at it from a place age range don't come at it from a place of scarcity or greed of like wanting as of scarcity or greed of like wanting as of scarcity or greed of like wanting as many matches as possible think about many matches as possible think about many matches as possible think about okay who would I actually see myself okay who would I actually see myself okay who would I actually see myself ending up with and then decide based on ending up with and then decide based on ending up with and then decide based on that similarly geographical location is that similarly geographical location is that similarly geographical location is super important one of the biggest super important one of the biggest super important one of the biggest predictors of Love is proximity because predictors of Love is proximity because predictors of Love is proximity because who we are in closer proximity with like who we are in closer proximity with like who we are in closer proximity with like physically geographically we're more physically geographically we're more physically geographically we're more likely to see more often and the more we likely to see more often and the more we likely to see more often and the more we see someone the more of a positive see someone the more of a positive see someone the more of a positive impression we have of them I talk about 
[7:22]
impression we have of them I talk about impression we have of them I talk about this in the connection course that this this in the connection course that this this in the connection course that this is why people tend to be really good is why people tend to be really good is why people tend to be really good friends with their roommates their friends with their roommates their friends with their roommates their neighbors they tend to date people who neighbors they tend to date people who neighbors they tend to date people who live in a certain neighborhood as them live in a certain neighborhood as them live in a certain neighborhood as them or at least a certain city because the or at least a certain city because the or at least a certain city because the more opportunities you have to interact more opportunities you have to interact more opportunities you have to interact with person the easier it is to interact with person the easier it is to interact with person the easier it is to interact with these people the more you're going with these people the more you're going with these people the more you're going to have a connection with them probably to have a connection with them probably to have a connection with them probably of course there are exceptions I'm sure of course there are exceptions I'm sure of course there are exceptions I'm sure there are people who are going to rush there are people who are going to rush there are people who are going to rush to the comments to tell me about their to the comments to tell me about their to the comments to tell me about their longdistance relationship I get it I've longdistance relationship I get it I've longdistance relationship I get it I've been in one too I'm talking about been in one too I'm talking about been in one too I'm talking about General Trends so that's one thing I General Trends so that's one thing I General Trends so that's one thing I wouldn't go too far out in terms of AG wouldn't go too far out in terms of AG wouldn't go too far out in terms of AG range and I wouldn't go too far out in 
[7:53]
range and I wouldn't go too far out in range and I wouldn't go too far out in terms of geographical location might not terms of geographical location might not terms of geographical location might not even include suburbs for instance even include suburbs for instance even include suburbs for instance because I know I'm probably not going to because I know I'm probably not going to because I know I'm probably not going to want to drive 30 minutes back and forth want to drive 30 minutes back and forth want to drive 30 minutes back and forth for a date second thing about how I for a date second thing about how I for a date second thing about how I would put my best foot forward is I would put my best foot forward is I would put my best foot forward is I would be smart about understanding would be smart about understanding would be smart about understanding respectability politics some people are respectability politics some people are respectability politics some people are going to get mad at me for this but I do going to get mad at me for this but I do going to get mad at me for this but I do think there's something to be said about think there's something to be said about think there's something to be said about keeping in mind the sorts of biases and keeping in mind the sorts of biases and keeping in mind the sorts of biases and prejudices that people are going to have prejudices that people are going to have prejudices that people are going to have about you based on the way that you about you based on the way that you about you based on the way that you present yourself women in particular if present yourself women in particular if present yourself women in particular if you're dating men you need to be very 
[8:23]
you're dating men you need to be very you're dating men you need to be very aware that a lot of men will categorize aware that a lot of men will categorize aware that a lot of men will categorize women's respectability based on very women's respectability based on very women's respectability based on very mundane things like what they wear how mundane things like what they wear how mundane things like what they wear how they look the types of photos that they they look the types of photos that they they look the types of photos that they post and I used to be the type of person post and I used to be the type of person post and I used to be the type of person to think well that you know if to think well that you know if to think well that you know if somebody's going to judge me for the way somebody's going to judge me for the way somebody's going to judge me for the way that I look then I don't want that that I look then I don't want that that I look then I don't want that person in my life anyway but the more person in my life anyway but the more person in my life anyway but the more I've grown up the more I've realized I've grown up the more I've realized I've grown up the more I've realized that even the best of us can't really that even the best of us can't really that even the best of us can't really outrun the biases that are drilled into outrun the biases that are drilled into outrun the biases that are drilled into us we might still respect someone treat us we might still respect someone treat us we might still respect someone treat them respectfully but on some level if 
[8:53]
them respectfully but on some level if them respectfully but on some level if there are certain signals that we have there are certain signals that we have there are certain signals that we have internalized are not respectable we internalized are not respectable we internalized are not respectable we might put them them in a different tier might put them them in a different tier might put them them in a different tier than other signals so regardless of than other signals so regardless of than other signals so regardless of gender I think if you're portraying gender I think if you're portraying gender I think if you're portraying yourself in a very sexual way on these yourself in a very sexual way on these yourself in a very sexual way on these dating apps that's going to attract dating apps that's going to attract dating apps that's going to attract mainly casual sort of energy it's mainly casual sort of energy it's mainly casual sort of energy it's probably going to signal to people I'm probably going to signal to people I'm probably going to signal to people I'm not really sure for something very not really sure for something very not really sure for something very serious I'm looking just to have fun or serious I'm looking just to have fun or serious I'm looking just to have fun or to experience pleasure the other day I to experience pleasure the other day I to experience pleasure the other day I was on a ski Gondola and there was this was on a ski Gondola and there was this was on a ski Gondola and there was this group of guys who were all wearing suits group of guys who were all wearing suits group of guys who were all wearing suits down the slopes and me and my family 
[9:25]
down the slopes and me and my family down the slopes and me and my family were looking at them and we're like wow were looking at them and we're like wow were looking at them and we're like wow like that's so cool you know they're like that's so cool you know they're like that's so cool you know they're matching it looks funny when they're all matching it looks funny when they're all matching it looks funny when they're all skiing or snowboarding down in their skiing or snowboarding down in their skiing or snowboarding down in their suits when I tell you the second they suits when I tell you the second they suits when I tell you the second they started talking in the gondola I was so started talking in the gondola I was so started talking in the gondola I was so annoyed there was one of them that was annoyed there was one of them that was annoyed there was one of them that was saying something along the lines of uh saying something along the lines of uh saying something along the lines of uh oh I went to this wedding and there were oh I went to this wedding and there were oh I went to this wedding and there were a lot of really respectable women um and a lot of really respectable women um and a lot of really respectable women um and I'm not really looking for a respectable I'm not really looking for a respectable I'm not really looking for a respectable woman if you know what I woman if you know what I woman if you know what I mean and then he went into actually mean and then he went into actually mean and then he went into actually talking about how when he's on dating talking about how when he's on dating talking about how when he's on dating apps he will specifically look for women apps he will specifically look for women apps he will specifically look for women who are not respectable because he's 
[9:57]
who are not respectable because he's who are not respectable because he's presumably looking for something casual presumably looking for something casual presumably looking for something casual and this actually connects to what I and this actually connects to what I and this actually connects to what I found in this article which is that found in this article which is that found in this article which is that women tend to look for men who are more women tend to look for men who are more women tend to look for men who are more educated on these apps and men tend to educated on these apps and men tend to educated on these apps and men tend to look for women who are less educated and look for women who are less educated and look for women who are less educated and I wonder if that's related I wonder if I wonder if that's related I wonder if I wonder if that's related I wonder if on some level men feel like the less on some level men feel like the less on some level men feel like the less educated a woman is the less respectable educated a woman is the less respectable educated a woman is the less respectable she is so you got to be realistic about she is so you got to be realistic about she is so you got to be realistic about the way that people are going to the way that people are going to the way that people are going to perceive you and if you want to play perceive you and if you want to play perceive you and if you want to play this strategically and maximize your this strategically and maximize your this strategically and maximize your chances of finding the right person for chances of finding the right person for chances of finding the right person for you then you might want to portray 
[10:28]
you then you might want to portray you then you might want to portray yourself in ways that are societally yourself in ways that are societally yourself in ways that are societally respectable what does this mean respectable what does this mean respectable what does this mean concretely I would select flattering concretely I would select flattering concretely I would select flattering photos where you look cute or handsome photos where you look cute or handsome photos where you look cute or handsome or pretty or beautiful but not overtly or pretty or beautiful but not overtly or pretty or beautiful but not overtly sexual you know I wouldn't go for an sexual you know I wouldn't go for an sexual you know I wouldn't go for an energy that's like a sexy photo I might energy that's like a sexy photo I might energy that's like a sexy photo I might show a photo of me wearing maybe a show a photo of me wearing maybe a show a photo of me wearing maybe a cocktail dress maybe form-fitting jeans cocktail dress maybe form-fitting jeans cocktail dress maybe form-fitting jeans maybe a flowy skirt some makeup but not maybe a flowy skirt some makeup but not maybe a flowy skirt some makeup but not too much for men I might go with a nice too much for men I might go with a nice too much for men I might go with a nice shirt or a button- down tailored pants shirt or a button- down tailored pants shirt or a button- down tailored pants and regardless of gender I would and regardless of gender I would and regardless of gender I would absolutely recommend smiling looking 
[11:00]
absolutely recommend smiling looking absolutely recommend smiling looking friendly looking happy I do think I friendly looking happy I do think I friendly looking happy I do think I would include photos of my social life would include photos of my social life would include photos of my social life but I used to see this all the time but I used to see this all the time but I used to see this all the time please don't just include photos of you please don't just include photos of you please don't just include photos of you with other people especially if they're with other people especially if they're with other people especially if they're significantly more attractive than you significantly more attractive than you significantly more attractive than you because it is very obvious to people because it is very obvious to people because it is very obvious to people when you are posing with an attractive when you are posing with an attractive when you are posing with an attractive friend as a way to sort of trick people friend as a way to sort of trick people friend as a way to sort of trick people into thinking that you are that into thinking that you are that into thinking that you are that attractive friend it seems insecure and attractive friend it seems insecure and attractive friend it seems insecure and honestly it's like borderline catf fishy honestly it's like borderline catf fishy honestly it's like borderline catf fishy so own what you got and don't worry 
[11:30]
so own what you got and don't worry so own what you got and don't worry about the rest and if you're going to about the rest and if you're going to about the rest and if you're going to show your social life I would recommend show your social life I would recommend show your social life I would recommend showing settings where you're you know showing settings where you're you know showing settings where you're you know with other people like at a party at a with other people like at a party at a with other people like at a party at a popup traveling Etc um maybe like one or popup traveling Etc um maybe like one or popup traveling Etc um maybe like one or two photos of you with some friends or two photos of you with some friends or two photos of you with some friends or with a friend but definitely not all of with a friend but definitely not all of with a friend but definitely not all of them and definitely don't try to trick them and definitely don't try to trick them and definitely don't try to trick people into thinking that you're more people into thinking that you're more people into thinking that you're more attractive based on the people that attractive based on the people that attractive based on the people that you're with some things that I would try you're with some things that I would try you're with some things that I would try to avoid no fish men please I don't to avoid no fish men please I don't to avoid no fish men please I don't understand what's with the fish photos I understand what's with the fish photos I understand what's with the fish photos I don't understand so many men do this and don't understand so many men do this and don't understand so many men do this and a lot of women are baffled by it no Rave 
[12:01]
a lot of women are baffled by it no Rave a lot of women are baffled by it no Rave outfits no mirror selfies no gym selfies outfits no mirror selfies no gym selfies outfits no mirror selfies no gym selfies no topless or bikini pictures like I no topless or bikini pictures like I no topless or bikini pictures like I don't make up the rules I'm not saying don't make up the rules I'm not saying don't make up the rules I'm not saying the rules should be like this but I'm the rules should be like this but I'm the rules should be like this but I'm saying if you want to play the saying if you want to play the saying if you want to play the respectability politics game these are respectability politics game these are respectability politics game these are probably some things you might want to probably some things you might want to probably some things you might want to consider something else that's really consider something else that's really consider something else that's really important I would really make sure to important I would really make sure to important I would really make sure to evoke your personality and your hobbies evoke your personality and your hobbies evoke your personality and your hobbies in the photos so like if you like hiking in the photos so like if you like hiking in the photos so like if you like hiking if you like traveling or swimming show if you like traveling or swimming show if you like traveling or swimming show photos of you in those settings doing photos of you in those settings doing photos of you in those settings doing those things it's kind of a conversation those things it's kind of a conversation those things it's kind of a conversation starter um if you're a student you know starter um if you're a student you know starter um if you're a student you know showing you on a campus quad if you love 
[12:32]
showing you on a campus quad if you love showing you on a campus quad if you love pets show a photo of you with your pets pets show a photo of you with your pets pets show a photo of you with your pets if you like exploring and having good if you like exploring and having good if you like exploring and having good food and drinks maybe a photo of you at food and drinks maybe a photo of you at food and drinks maybe a photo of you at Christmas popup the setting should Christmas popup the setting should Christmas popup the setting should provide context not just you you know if provide context not just you you know if provide context not just you you know if it's just a beautiful headshot of you it's just a beautiful headshot of you it's just a beautiful headshot of you then it's like okay this person is then it's like okay this person is then it's like okay this person is beautiful but who are they I don't beautiful but who are they I don't beautiful but who are they I don't really know much about them now as for really know much about them now as for really know much about them now as for the bio I would try to strike a good the bio I would try to strike a good the bio I would try to strike a good balance not too long not too short don't balance not too long not too short don't balance not too long not too short don't put too much effort into it but don't put too much effort into it but don't put too much effort into it but don't put too little effort into it not too put too little effort into it not too put too little effort into it not too too quirky where you're trying to be too quirky where you're trying to be too quirky where you're trying to be funny and light but also not too funny and light but also not too funny and light but also not too aggressive where you're like laying down 
[13:03]
aggressive where you're like laying down aggressive where you're like laying down the law I've seen some crazy Tinder bios the law I've seen some crazy Tinder bios the law I've seen some crazy Tinder bios in um there's the series that Cody Co in um there's the series that Cody Co in um there's the series that Cody Co and his wife do reacting to some of and his wife do reacting to some of and his wife do reacting to some of these Tinder profiles so good so good I these Tinder profiles so good so good I these Tinder profiles so good so good I highly recommend there are some madeup highly recommend there are some madeup highly recommend there are some madeup examples of bad bios not looking for examples of bad bios not looking for examples of bad bios not looking for anything casual if you are swipe left I anything casual if you are swipe left I anything casual if you are swipe left I don't do coffee dates sober vegan okay don't do coffee dates sober vegan okay don't do coffee dates sober vegan okay why I don't love this one it's very why I don't love this one it's very why I don't love this one it's very blunt and kind of aggressive it it tells blunt and kind of aggressive it it tells blunt and kind of aggressive it it tells people what you are and aren't looking people what you are and aren't looking people what you are and aren't looking for but some people might be so off-put for but some people might be so off-put for but some people might be so off-put by your tone that they're actually going 
[13:34]
by your tone that they're actually going by your tone that they're actually going to troll you there's a gentler way to to troll you there's a gentler way to to troll you there's a gentler way to say this like one of my friends I think say this like one of my friends I think say this like one of my friends I think she put in her bio one time I'm looking she put in her bio one time I'm looking she put in her bio one time I'm looking for my wife which is like it's silly for my wife which is like it's silly for my wife which is like it's silly it's blunt it's much less aggressive it's blunt it's much less aggressive it's blunt it's much less aggressive than saying if you want something casual than saying if you want something casual than saying if you want something casual then swipe left I also think it's kind then swipe left I also think it's kind then swipe left I also think it's kind of tricky to strike a balance between of tricky to strike a balance between of tricky to strike a balance between speaking about the things that are speaking about the things that are speaking about the things that are important to you and not just listing important to you and not just listing important to you and not just listing off identities that don't mean much on off identities that don't mean much on off identities that don't mean much on their own for instance just listing so their own for instance just listing so their own for instance just listing so vegan plant-based a therapist Etc you vegan plant-based a therapist Etc you vegan plant-based a therapist Etc you know like all these things they yeah know like all these things they yeah know like all these things they yeah they paint a picture about who you are 
[14:05]
they paint a picture about who you are they paint a picture about who you are but you're more than your identities but you're more than your identities but you're more than your identities you're more than just these labels you're more than just these labels you're more than just these labels another example of a bio I wouldn't another example of a bio I wouldn't another example of a bio I wouldn't recommend 21 years old Fort recommend 21 years old Fort recommend 21 years old Fort Lauderdale it's so simple and has so Lauderdale it's so simple and has so Lauderdale it's so simple and has so little effort put into it that it makes little effort put into it that it makes little effort put into it that it makes me feel like this person isn't truly me feel like this person isn't truly me feel like this person isn't truly looking for love here they're not truly looking for love here they're not truly looking for love here they're not truly looking for connection because I don't looking for connection because I don't looking for connection because I don't know anything about them based on this know anything about them based on this know anything about them based on this and here's a third example of one I and here's a third example of one I and here's a third example of one I would not recommend looking for Borat would not recommend looking for Borat would not recommend looking for Borat voice my wife I was born in California voice my wife I was born in California voice my wife I was born in California but I've lived in Washington for the but I've lived in Washington for the but I've lived in Washington for the past seven years when I enrolled in the 
[14:35]
past seven years when I enrolled in the past seven years when I enrolled in the military don't worry I'm not like those military don't worry I'm not like those military don't worry I'm not like those other guys I'm a cool calm collected guy other guys I'm a cool calm collected guy other guys I'm a cool calm collected guy message me if you want to learn more the message me if you want to learn more the message me if you want to learn more the reason I don't like this one is it seems reason I don't like this one is it seems reason I don't like this one is it seems like it's trying too hard to be quirky like it's trying too hard to be quirky like it's trying too hard to be quirky and funny to the point where it's like a and funny to the point where it's like a and funny to the point where it's like a little off-putting so maybe like tone little off-putting so maybe like tone little off-putting so maybe like tone down the energy a little bit and trim it down the energy a little bit and trim it down the energy a little bit and trim it down so what do you want to put in your down so what do you want to put in your down so what do you want to put in your bio here are some questions that might bio here are some questions that might bio here are some questions that might help you figure it out what are your help you figure it out what are your help you figure it out what are your values and where do you practice those values and where do you practice those values and where do you practice those values for instance if you are a health values for instance if you are a health values for instance if you are a health nut you probably shop at Whole Foods go nut you probably shop at Whole Foods go nut you probably shop at Whole Foods go to the gym go to the sauna cold plunge 
[15:06]
to the gym go to the sauna cold plunge to the gym go to the sauna cold plunge Etc so those are things you might want Etc so those are things you might want Etc so those are things you might want to mention you know you might want to to mention you know you might want to to mention you know you might want to talk about on Saturdays I do the Sonic talk about on Saturdays I do the Sonic talk about on Saturdays I do the Sonic cult plunge and have what do healthy cult plunge and have what do healthy cult plunge and have what do healthy people eats bone broth soup where it's people eats bone broth soup where it's people eats bone broth soup where it's very clear to the other person what your very clear to the other person what your very clear to the other person what your values are another question what do you values are another question what do you values are another question what do you like to do you know we're not talking like to do you know we're not talking like to do you know we're not talking about big values here just talking about about big values here just talking about about big values here just talking about the little things little details can the little things little details can the little things little details can also be very evocative about who you are also be very evocative about who you are also be very evocative about who you are as a person like if you like certain as a person like if you like certain as a person like if you like certain food certain music certain places to food certain music certain places to food certain music certain places to travel certain books TV lifestyle Etc travel certain books TV lifestyle Etc travel certain books TV lifestyle Etc contrasts make up who you are I like 
[15:36]
contrasts make up who you are I like contrasts make up who you are I like this one because people sometimes aren't this one because people sometimes aren't this one because people sometimes aren't very contrasted so when they do meet very contrasted so when they do meet very contrasted so when they do meet someone who's a person of contrast like someone who's a person of contrast like someone who's a person of contrast like say for instance uh a Christian who's say for instance uh a Christian who's say for instance uh a Christian who's also very open-minded people are going also very open-minded people are going also very open-minded people are going to feel intrigued by that they're going to feel intrigued by that they're going to feel intrigued by that they're going to want to know more they're going to to want to know more they're going to to want to know more they're going to want to ask you questions people love to want to ask you questions people love to want to ask you questions people love to be around those who are contrasted who be around those who are contrasted who be around those who are contrasted who kind of keep you on your toes you can't kind of keep you on your toes you can't kind of keep you on your toes you can't quite guess quite guess quite guess um where they stand on certain things um where they stand on certain things um where they stand on certain things and so if there is something about you and so if there is something about you and so if there is something about you that contrasts I would try to find a way that contrasts I would try to find a way that contrasts I would try to find a way to evoke that another question what do 
[16:07]
to evoke that another question what do to evoke that another question what do you want people to ask you about for you want people to ask you about for you want people to ask you about for instance if you really love writing but instance if you really love writing but instance if you really love writing but there's nothing about you loving writing there's nothing about you loving writing there's nothing about you loving writing or books and or any of that on your or books and or any of that on your or books and or any of that on your profile people are probably not going to profile people are probably not going to profile people are probably not going to know to ask you about it but if you have know to ask you about it but if you have know to ask you about it but if you have something on there like I read 200 books something on there like I read 200 books something on there like I read 200 books this year someone might say oh my God this year someone might say oh my God this year someone might say oh my God how did you do that and then you start a how did you do that and then you start a how did you do that and then you start a conversation about how you're a writer conversation about how you're a writer conversation about how you're a writer and I think the key with bios is and I think the key with bios is and I think the key with bios is actually you do kind of have to be a actually you do kind of have to be a actually you do kind of have to be a good writer because you have to show not good writer because you have to show not good writer because you have to show not tell you can't just list off who you are tell you can't just list off who you are tell you can't just list off who you are or go into this big paragraph of Pros 
[16:38]
or go into this big paragraph of Pros or go into this big paragraph of Pros about who you are you have to leave about who you are you have to leave about who you are you have to leave little Snippets here little Snippets little Snippets here little Snippets little Snippets here little Snippets here little details about you that draw here little details about you that draw here little details about you that draw people to want to ask more about you people to want to ask more about you people to want to ask more about you they leave room for questions but not so they leave room for questions but not so they leave room for questions but not so much room that they don't know what to much room that they don't know what to much room that they don't know what to ask you about that they don't know ask you about that they don't know ask you about that they don't know anything about you does that make sense anything about you does that make sense anything about you does that make sense so here's an example of what a good bio so here's an example of what a good bio so here's an example of what a good bio might look like Romanian American might look like Romanian American might look like Romanian American therapist and writer I love hiking therapist and writer I love hiking therapist and writer I love hiking traveling reading and waking up in traveling reading and waking up in traveling reading and waking up in unfortunate hours so kind of poked a unfortunate hours so kind of poked a unfortunate hours so kind of poked a little bit of fun in myself basically little bit of fun in myself basically little bit of fun in myself basically outed myself as one of those people that outed myself as one of those people that outed myself as one of those people that wakes up at 6:00 a.m. naturally um wakes up at 6:00 a.m. naturally um wakes up at 6:00 a.m. naturally um there's humor there's values there's 
[17:09]
there's humor there's values there's there's humor there's values there's specific details a little bit of my specific details a little bit of my specific details a little bit of my identities but not too much where it identities but not too much where it identities but not too much where it feels like I'm just listing off things feels like I'm just listing off things feels like I'm just listing off things it's just the important stuff lastly how it's just the important stuff lastly how it's just the important stuff lastly how would I turn A Match Into Love I think would I turn A Match Into Love I think would I turn A Match Into Love I think it starts right when you start swiping I it starts right when you start swiping I it starts right when you start swiping I would swipe right very strategically I would swipe right very strategically I would swipe right very strategically I would consistently ask myself I saw this would consistently ask myself I saw this would consistently ask myself I saw this person out at a bar and they came up to person out at a bar and they came up to person out at a bar and they came up to me and asked me if I want to go out on a me and asked me if I want to go out on a me and asked me if I want to go out on a date would I want to say yes or no and date would I want to say yes or no and date would I want to say yes or no and the truth is there are certain things the truth is there are certain things the truth is there are certain things that you just can't tell in person that you just can't tell in person that you just can't tell in person versus online that if you could see them versus online that if you could see them versus online that if you could see them in person your answer might be different 
[17:40]
in person your answer might be different in person your answer might be different but remember what I said everything that but remember what I said everything that but remember what I said everything that happens online is basically just a happens online is basically just a happens online is basically just a reflection of everything that happens in reflection of everything that happens in reflection of everything that happens in real life don't do anything online that real life don't do anything online that real life don't do anything online that you wouldn't do in real life so in the you wouldn't do in real life so in the you wouldn't do in real life so in the context of dating apps that means don't context of dating apps that means don't context of dating apps that means don't swipe right on people you wouldn't swipe right on people you wouldn't swipe right on people you wouldn't actually want to date and then after actually want to date and then after actually want to date and then after that you know say hi or wait for them to that you know say hi or wait for them to that you know say hi or wait for them to to say hi this is where match plus one to say hi this is where match plus one to say hi this is where match plus one comes in really handy um I have a video comes in really handy um I have a video comes in really handy um I have a video on Match plus one the skill to sort of on Match plus one the skill to sort of on Match plus one the skill to sort of deepen intimacy while assessing if the deepen intimacy while assessing if the deepen intimacy while assessing if the other person is reciprocating match plus other person is reciprocating match plus other person is reciprocating match plus one is also in the connection course I 
[18:10]
one is also in the connection course I one is also in the connection course I would definitely want to assess for would definitely want to assess for would definitely want to assess for safety uh and this isn't like a how to safety uh and this isn't like a how to safety uh and this isn't like a how to guide but I feel like I'm pretty good guide but I feel like I'm pretty good guide but I feel like I'm pretty good about feeling out whether they are red about feeling out whether they are red about feeling out whether they are red flags about people whether they're being flags about people whether they're being flags about people whether they're being aggressive or coercive or rude or aggressive or coercive or rude or aggressive or coercive or rude or disrespectful because if someone doesn't disrespectful because if someone doesn't disrespectful because if someone doesn't respect you then they're probably not respect you then they're probably not respect you then they're probably not going to care about your safety either I going to care about your safety either I going to care about your safety either I would try to assess values alignment so would try to assess values alignment so would try to assess values alignment so trying to see do I like this person do I trying to see do I like this person do I trying to see do I like this person do I stand for what they stand for or does stand for what they stand for or does stand for what they stand for or does there seem to be a really big values there seem to be a really big values there seem to be a really big values Clash because as we know from the Clash because as we know from the Clash because as we know from the research people don't need to have 
[18:42]
research people don't need to have research people don't need to have exactly the same beliefs to be together exactly the same beliefs to be together exactly the same beliefs to be together but they do need to have the same values but they do need to have the same values but they do need to have the same values if there's a values clash in a if there's a values clash in a if there's a values clash in a relationship that's going to be very relationship that's going to be very relationship that's going to be very long-term issue that probably can't get long-term issue that probably can't get long-term issue that probably can't get solved and here's another thing I would solved and here's another thing I would solved and here's another thing I would assess attachment assess attachment assess attachment style so the research Arch shows that style so the research Arch shows that style so the research Arch shows that people who are on dating apps tend to be people who are on dating apps tend to be people who are on dating apps tend to be more anxious and avoidant in their more anxious and avoidant in their more anxious and avoidant in their attachment style and that's not really attachment style and that's not really attachment style and that's not really what you want you want to have a pool of what you want you want to have a pool of what you want you want to have a pool of largely secure attachment style people largely secure attachment style people largely secure attachment style people but it makes sense that people on dating 
[19:12]
but it makes sense that people on dating but it makes sense that people on dating apps might not be so warning signs that apps might not be so warning signs that apps might not be so warning signs that someone has an anxious attachment style someone has an anxious attachment style someone has an anxious attachment style might be very fast and frequent might be very fast and frequent might be very fast and frequent responses they get distressed if you responses they get distressed if you responses they get distressed if you don't immediately respond they might don't immediately respond they might don't immediately respond they might double triple quadruple text you double triple quadruple text you double triple quadruple text you instantly want a date without getting to instantly want a date without getting to instantly want a date without getting to know you at all they might be very know you at all they might be very know you at all they might be very complimentary or seem to really like you complimentary or seem to really like you complimentary or seem to really like you again before actually knowing who you again before actually knowing who you again before actually knowing who you are what you stand for someone with are what you stand for someone with are what you stand for someone with avoidant attachment style might be not avoidant attachment style might be not avoidant attachment style might be not very responsive at all takes hours or very responsive at all takes hours or very responsive at all takes hours or days to to respond every single time or 
[19:43]
days to to respond every single time or days to to respond every single time or just flat out doesn't respond and just just flat out doesn't respond and just just flat out doesn't respond and just never seems to want to take it to the never seems to want to take it to the never seems to want to take it to the next step or if you suggest hey do you next step or if you suggest hey do you next step or if you suggest hey do you want to talk on the phone they might say want to talk on the phone they might say want to talk on the phone they might say yeah and then they never follow up yeah and then they never follow up yeah and then they never follow up versus someone with a secure attachment versus someone with a secure attachment versus someone with a secure attachment style responds when they're available style responds when they're available style responds when they're available okay so they don't respond if they're okay so they don't respond if they're okay so they don't respond if they're not available they don't respond if not available they don't respond if not available they don't respond if they're at work or they're out with they're at work or they're out with they're at work or they're out with friends or whatever they're also not friends or whatever they're also not friends or whatever they're also not playing games you know they're not playing games you know they're not playing games you know they're not trying to prolong how long they're trying to prolong how long they're trying to prolong how long they're responding to you and they're not responding to you and they're not responding to you and they're not forgetting about you completely they forgetting about you completely they forgetting about you completely they respond with variation you know somebody respond with variation you know somebody respond with variation you know somebody that has a secure attachment style who that has a secure attachment style who that has a secure attachment style who responds when they have a chance there's 
[20:15]
responds when they have a chance there's responds when they have a chance there's going to be some variation sometimes going to be some variation sometimes going to be some variation sometimes they're going to respond every 2 minutes they're going to respond every 2 minutes they're going to respond every 2 minutes sometimes they're going to respond maybe sometimes they're going to respond maybe sometimes they're going to respond maybe every 7 hours they're going to be open every 7 hours they're going to be open every 7 hours they're going to be open to meeting up but not desperate they're to meeting up but not desperate they're to meeting up but not desperate they're going to want to get to know a little going to want to get to know a little going to want to get to know a little bit about you and maybe after a few days bit about you and maybe after a few days bit about you and maybe after a few days or a week or so they're want to boost or a week or so they're want to boost or a week or so they're want to boost the intimacy I have a chapter on the intimacy I have a chapter on the intimacy I have a chapter on attachment style in the connection attachment style in the connection attachment style in the connection course as well by the way you might also course as well by the way you might also course as well by the way you might also want to just flat out ask people what want to just flat out ask people what want to just flat out ask people what they're looking for on these apps I they're looking for on these apps I they're looking for on these apps I think sometimes people are scared to do think sometimes people are scared to do think sometimes people are scared to do that cuz they're scared of like pushing that cuz they're scared of like pushing that cuz they're scared of like pushing that person away but here's the thing that person away but here's the thing that person away but here's the thing someone gets scared Away by a simple someone gets scared Away by a simple someone gets scared Away by a simple question of what are you looking for 
[20:46]
question of what are you looking for question of what are you looking for then they're probably not looking for then they're probably not looking for then they're probably not looking for love or they haven't avoid an attachment love or they haven't avoid an attachment love or they haven't avoid an attachment style or they're going to get scared style or they're going to get scared style or they're going to get scared away at some point anyway so why not away at some point anyway so why not away at some point anyway so why not make it early on when you can cut your make it early on when you can cut your make it early on when you can cut your losses so signs that someone is probably losses so signs that someone is probably losses so signs that someone is probably not looking for love when you ask this not looking for love when you ask this not looking for love when you ask this question question is they might say question question is they might say question question is they might say something casual play it by ear just something casual play it by ear just something casual play it by ear just have fun oh I just got out of a serious have fun oh I just got out of a serious have fun oh I just got out of a serious relationship so I'm not sure probably relationship so I'm not sure probably relationship so I'm not sure probably not looking for love a person who is not looking for love a person who is not looking for love a person who is looking for love will not be scared that looking for love will not be scared that looking for love will not be scared that you will get clingy if they admit that you will get clingy if they admit that you will get clingy if they admit that if they're scared of you latching on to if they're scared of you latching on to if they're scared of you latching on to them if they admit they want a 
[21:16]
them if they admit they want a them if they admit they want a relationship then they're probably relationship then they're probably relationship then they're probably avoidant then they probably aren't avoidant then they probably aren't avoidant then they probably aren't really ready for a relationship and then really ready for a relationship and then really ready for a relationship and then once you've assessed okay this person is once you've assessed okay this person is once you've assessed okay this person is safe they seem like they're compatible safe they seem like they're compatible safe they seem like they're compatible they tell me they want the same thing as they tell me they want the same thing as they tell me they want the same thing as me escalate you know talk to them on the me escalate you know talk to them on the me escalate you know talk to them on the phone I think if I were looking for love phone I think if I were looking for love phone I think if I were looking for love in this era of my life I would totally in this era of my life I would totally in this era of my life I would totally want to FaceTime first to get a sense want to FaceTime first to get a sense want to FaceTime first to get a sense for a person's body language their tone for a person's body language their tone for a person's body language their tone to make sure that they actually are who to make sure that they actually are who to make sure that they actually are who they say they are talking on the phone they say they are talking on the phone they say they are talking on the phone can help too but again you can't really can help too but again you can't really can help too but again you can't really assess if someone's catfishing you that assess if someone's catfishing you that assess if someone's catfishing you that way and if you don't get any red flags 
[21:47]
way and if you don't get any red flags way and if you don't get any red flags if it's a nice lovely conversation then if it's a nice lovely conversation then if it's a nice lovely conversation then meet up with them somewhere safe meet up with them somewhere safe meet up with them somewhere safe somewhere public don't let them pick you somewhere public don't let them pick you somewhere public don't let them pick you up because that is so dangerous for up because that is so dangerous for up because that is so dangerous for someone that you don't know I would let someone that you don't know I would let someone that you don't know I would let a close friend of yours just know where a close friend of yours just know where a close friend of yours just know where you're going when the information of you're going when the information of you're going when the information of that person you know like phone number that person you know like phone number that person you know like phone number photos name all of that because even if photos name all of that because even if photos name all of that because even if they're lying if something does happen they're lying if something does happen they're lying if something does happen God forbid that's important to know God forbid that's important to know God forbid that's important to know someone needs to have that information someone needs to have that information someone needs to have that information so that's what I would do if I were on so that's what I would do if I were on so that's what I would do if I were on dating apps I'm not saying that's what dating apps I'm not saying that's what dating apps I'm not saying that's what you have to do but I hope that this you have to do but I hope that this you have to do but I hope that this helped you in one way or another don't 
[22:17]
helped you in one way or another don't helped you in one way or another don't forget about the vday sale I hope that forget about the vday sale I hope that forget about the vday sale I hope that you have a lovely lovely day and I'll you have a lovely lovely day and I'll you have a lovely lovely day and I'll see you see you see you [Music] soon [Music]